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A Zinda Guwahatian Oldboy

“Radishes”, my mother exclaims, “You loved radishes, didn’t you? You there, how much are you selling those radishes for?”

“Maaaaa, no radishes. Whoever said I like them?”, I reply.

“Radishes 8 rupees a puwaa, baidew”, “Only 7 rupees a puwaa”. “The freshest ones right here, baidew”. A puwaa is 250 grams, and baidew is Axomiya for elder sister.

“Alright, squashes then. Squashes are good for health.” She persists.

I make my best windpipe-slit-by-samurai-sword-noise, a kind of wet gurgling that peeves her completely, as she looks at the radishes, and dismisses them, and prods at the cabbages. Cabbages are safe, she decides, because I do not react at all, and proceeds to buy two huge ones.

The shopkeepers look resentfully at the radish-hater and his mother as they exit from the maze of shops. I try my best not to look guilty.

* * *
I tell my parents I am buying a computer for them. My mother, who painstakingly writes out five copies of a question-paper for her tuition students every other day, could do with a printer – she even did an MS Office course thingie a couple of months back, just before my old computer decided to conk out for good. My father who warily circled the old computer until I showed him that it could play movies too, and how, was just getting used to it – I was kind of getting used myself to the phone calls asking me how to make the Windows Media Player fullscreen when a video was playing.

So this time, I tell them I am buying a new computer, and also point out that an internet connection would be good, now that BSNL has these broadband schemes. Somehow my father detects that note of hesitation when I talk about the internet. “What is it?”, he asks me, “A lot of bother? Forget it then.”

“Not really”, I tell him. “It’s just that if you aren’t careful enough, you might get viruses and I am a little worried about how you guys would handle it.”

“No, no, we will be careful. I will make sure nobody’s wearing shoes inside the computer room.”

I love these guys.

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Heads-up from Guwahati!

Right, so I am at home and chilling out good and proper. I am chilling out so much that I cannot go to bed without wearing a sweater and socks and two mattresses. Brrr.

So you can download the quiz I did at IIM Kolkata, I was conscious enough after the late-night/early-morning revelries to upload both the powerpoints right here. The prelims are about 3 MB, and the finals are 8.7 MB.

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ANNNNNNNND

The quiz is done.

I am conducting the lit-arts quiz for this year’s Nihilanth, the annual ( well, sort of) inter-IIT-IIM quiz festival, due to be held on the 14th and 15th at IIM Kolkata. This is one of the rare times when personal stuff has taken precedence over question-setting, and I had to stay back late at the office two days before the quiz to finish setting all the questions. I have never cut it this close, and I will be glad, really really glad, if the quiz is well-received.

Reasons behind this lateness: my recent move from Bangalore to Hyderabad, and the fact that I have not unpacked any of my books/CDs/DVDs and my computer. Why? Because I am off, right after Nihilanth, to Guwahati, for a well-deserved two-week vacation, and I didn’t want the hassle of reorganising and dusting the preciousses after I get back. A lot of furniture-buying and room-reorganising are in the pipeline once I return. Also, had to do some major work-related revisions at the office, so not too much time to access the Internet there. The All-Important Call for which I was doing so got over about two hours ago, and I could rush through the final touches to the quiz. Another reason was that my roomie’s internet connection seems to have conked off for the past three days, leaving me unable to do much at home post-office.

The plan for the Guwahati trip is to listen to all of John Zorn’s albums ( a gigatorrent of which did whatever all well-recommended gigatorrents tend to do), and re-read the first couple of books of a series that I plan to finish after I am back. ( What series? I am not saying anything. It might be a question in my quiz, heh) If I am lucky, my sister and brother-in-law will also be at home at the time, on a brief trip from London, where both of them are working at the moment. If I am really lucky, my sister will be able to spare luggage-space to get the 28 volumes of Lone Wolf and Cub at one go, along with assorted signed books.

And in other news, I bought a washing machine. Haier, fully-automatic, 5 year-warranty and all that. Now if only those lazy salespeople would come and set the thing up….

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It’s Fate, I tell you.

So today morning, I get a slightly panicky mail from Vasu, who is away from Hyderabad on work this month, about paying his credit card bill, the last date for which was the eleventh of this month i.e today. I agreed to deposit the cheque at the bank, which happened to be at Nagarjuna circle, just a stone’s throw away from my office ( that is, if the stone is equipped with a directional analyser and a suitable anti-gravity algorithm). So off I went at lunchtime, picking up my chequebook from my house, and going over to Nagarjuna Circle by the usual Begumpet-Sowmajiguda-Panjagutta route.

It is a truth universally acknowledged that a single man in possession of a light vehicle and an amount of disposable income passing through Panjagutta, must make a quick stop at MR Book Centre.

Truth be told, I was only looking for the price tag on The Mysterious Flame of Queen Lloana, the Eco book that I remembered seeing the other day at that place. (Just in case you’re interested, they are selling it for 450 Rs, the hardcover – am pretty sure I can get it for 350 ) And when I was done checking that out, was about to leave when…

Scott McCloud’s Understanding Comics beamed down at me from between a couple of National Geographic Specials and a Science Encyclopaedia. A light-headed look at the price tag, a little bit of bargaining, and I got it for 200.

I would write more, but I am a little freaked out right now.

P.S I did remember to deposit the cheque, Vasu.

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Hyderabad, the materialistic part of it…

I spent half of New Year’s Day in the airport, courtesy Deccan Airlines, which had declared on the previous day that the flight due to depart at 1:15 PM would instead leave at 10:15 AM, and which, after making sure that I had arrived at the airport sleep-deprived and hungry beyond belief, announced that the flight would depart at 2:15 PM. GAH!

But then, coming back to familiar territory, observing first-hand how much the MCH has done to widen the already-wide Begumpet roads, the autodriver chatting amiably about the proposed flyover from Greenpark all the way to Nagarjuna Circle, and finally, opening the door to my room and my preciousses inside – that made up for all the morning crabbiness.

Paid my visits to Best Book Stall and MR Book Stall, learnt that Best is organising a sale at the YMCA Hall from the 6th of this month, found that MR book stall now has another outlet at RTC Crossroads. Man, all these months at Bangalore and I had almost forgotten that you could still get books for forty rupees – cursory searching at Best got me

three Tom Sharpe novels (including Porterhouse Blue, yippee!),
the second volume of Larry Gonick’s Cartoon History of the Universe,
FX Toole’s Rope Burns – the novel on which “Million Dollar Baby” was based,
Bret Easton Ellis’s The Informers.

The trip to MR got me :

Jonathan Lethem’s Guns With Occasional Music ( which I just finished yesterday, excellent book, full of noir spoofs and animals with guns and attitude, like a cross between Chandler and Warren Ellis),
a couple of odd comics, including an Eclipse issue of Nausicaa of the Valley of the Wind by Miyazaki himself, a couple of random Cerebus issues, a couple of Moebius’s Elsewhere Prince
A sexy coffee-table book called Faeries, illustrated by Alan Lee ( who was one of the lead artists on the Lord of the Rings trilogy), for the grand price of 125 rupees. Muwhahahahahah!

Hit the Best Book Sale on Saturday with sonataindica ( the man had gone West, and very happily, his flight developed Air Deccanitis too ), was amazed to see all Far Side anthologies on sale at 125 Rs each. Bah! After all the hard work I had done to collect my copies individually. The day started on a bad note of sorts, found that some early browser had picked up a book on the Blues, and a terrific-looking copy of The Last Temptation of Christ just as the sale had opened. Damn. Also, there were no science fiction books on sale ( “They don’t seem to sell nowadays”, Ahmed-sir commented sadly when I asked him the reason. Ah well, he should go to Blossom and see sales there, I guess)

Stuff picked up at the Best Book Sale:

The New Bedside Agatha Christie Reader, which made me really happy because I hadn’t picked it up at Blossom ( It was on sale there for 250, and it was too much for that old copy) Not only did my patience get me the book at a cheaper rate, I also got the newer edition. Third Law at work, people. *snicker snicker*

Vampires by John Steakley, the book on which the John Carpenter movie was based. My fanboy instincts kicked into overdrive when I saw this, because I saw the movie twice at Sterling, just before passing out of college, and almost flicked the VCD from the local video parlour at W.

A bunch of Matt Groening’s Life is Hell books. Funny thing is, everytime I buy one of these books, I always think that’s the end of it, there cannot be anything more in this series – but they just keep coming out. I got Love is Hell, and The Huge Book of Hell this time.

A couple of Bloom county collections at 40 Rs each, a Foxtrot compendium, and the first Outlander collection.

Ray Bradbury’s Zen in the Art of Writing, a collection of essays on writing and technique. Read vaguely corny, but what the heck – Bradbury is Bradbury after all, especially at 40 Rs.

The second volume of a series of essays on famous Western composers. Good, even though the first volume was missing, because it covered the lesser-known canon – Rimsky Korsakov, Shostakovich, Saint-Saens et al.

The Encyclopaedia of Pop Culture by Jane and Michael Stern. 200 Rupees, har har har.

Hit Frankfurt Book Sale yesterday, just for kicks and found A Long Strange Trip: The Inside Story of the Grateful Dead, and a Tom Wolfe three-books-in-one collection for sub-150 prices. Was done browsing, and while the guy was writing out the bill, sauntered over to the Nora Roberts/Jackie Collins/Danielle Steele section, just looking around at the prices. And that was when I saw Howl’s Moving Castle by Diana Wynne-Jones, with a marked price of 40 Rs.

I love Hyderabad.

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