Give me the name of a Hindi movie that connects Assam, Delhi, Kerala and Ladakh.
If your answer isn’t Dil Se, let me add another small clause to the question above. Give me a Hindi movie that connects Assam, Delhi, Kerala and Ladakh pointlessly.
Yes, you score 10 points if you said Dil Se.
Which is too bad. Dil Se was the movie to Look Forward to, once upon a time (or to be precise, in the summer of nineteen hundred and ninety eight ), a time when naive young lads were about to leave home for distant shores, a time when the three names “Mani Ratnam”, “AR Rahman” and “Gulzar” together on a movie poster elicited enthusiastic huzzahs, a time when college students incorporated discussions on the relative hotness of Manisha Koirala in the Indian Movie scene. Add to the mix the unverified rumour ( there was no Internet, after all, and Stardust was hardly a reliable source, even in those bygone days ) that this was going to be about familiar subjects – terrorism in, hold your breath, Assam, and there you have it. A mental countdown to the release date, with much listening and relistening of the Soundtrack.
If I remember right, Dil Se was released when I was on the train to Warangal. Thoughts about when I would see it were superseded by those of whether I would see it at all, horrific tales of …er…senior-junior interaction manifesting themselves in my consciousness. I did see it, of course. It was part of the regimen. Every Mess, every hostel room played Dil Se songs. Everybody was talking about the movie and everybody was aghast at the fact that The Guys From The Land Of Dil Se hadn’t seen the movie yet. “Go!” They yelled. “Go and don’t come back until you’ve memorised the film.” All part of the regimen.
We went, me, my father and my state-mates to this theater called Amrutha. I have a lot of happy memories about Amrutha theater, folks, and it all began here. It began when the titles came up, and it began with the collective cheer that filled the hall as scene by scene went by. I missed dialogues, but the enthu ( new RECian word ) was contagious. When Sapna Awasthi’s vocals heralded Chaiyya Chaiyya, somebody threw a mass of streamers into the air. They fluttered slowly among us, their shadows shimmering on the screen ( do shadows shimmer? ), and transforming the song from something really good to something unforgettable. It was magic.
And of course it was crap. The movie, I mean.
Dil Se didn’t make too much money – less gently said, it was a flop. The kind folks at REC Warangal tried very hard to increase profits by going to watch it multiple times ( later in life, I was to do the same for Ramgopal Verma’s Mast ) but that didn’t do much for it.
It was all wrong, of course, the rumours and the hype. About it being part of a trilogy, the Mani Trilogy of Indian Politics ( Bombay and Roja being the first two ) It wasn’t about Assam, it had the first half an hour set in Assam, and oh yes, the heroine was supposed to be Assamese. Forget the fact that she spoke better Hindi and worse Assamese than any other Assamese girl I’ve met. Also forget the fact that she spends her childhood in a place where it snows. ( Assam had a snow-making factory? I am even more clueless than I thought. ) and there are mysterious hands shooting at passersby from windows. It’s not even a Love Story set in Turbulent times, let me assure you, there being no love between the characters as we see them.
Nosirree, this movie is about that Pestilence of Indian Cinema of the Nineties – the man known as Shah Rukh Khan.
Note that I do not use the word “actor” anywhere in the rant above. Thanks.
How I look at Dil Se is this. Southern Director wants to go Northie, tries to hook known Star ( with NRI Potential and all )into pan-Indian debut. Southern Director knows Star’s histronical limitations, so he distills previous roles from the Star’s career, adds a tweak or two. By then, the Star refuses to work until there is more creative freedom for him, so Director agrees to whatever Star says. All songs must be a figment of my imagination, says Star. Yessir, says Director. There should be extended death scene, says Star. Yes Boss, says Director. ( Stop being smart, retorts Star, I liked that film. One of Aziz’s best, and mine too. ) And yes, adds Star, I need more excuses to wrinkle my eyebrows.
Ok, so I am being too kind to Mani Ratnam, and probably too unkind towards Shah Rukh Massa. But what to do? I have faith in one, and none whatsoever in the other.
Whatever be the case, Dil Se reeks of Shah Rukh Khan. It is infected by him. He’s like the fabled itch on your back that goes an inch away when you scratch it. He’s….ah, I could go on and on about this….he’s pestilential. And he ruins a movie already on the verge of collapsing under the director’s overindulgence. Which is a lesson for you. If you want someone to topple a movie, call Shah Rukh. He will drop his Pepsi Bottles and Airtel Recharge cards and come running.
Back to our topic -does anybody remember the story to Dil Se? It goes something like this –
This guy from the AIR, named Amar ( and who incidentally looks and talks and behaves exactly like Shah Rukh Khan ) comes to Assam, and he wants to catch the Barak Valley express. It’s a dark and stormy night, of course, and since everything interesting happens on dark and stormy nights, we know something’s coming. There’s a figure sleeping on the station, and one does not need to see two Mani Ratnam films to know that there will be a gust of wind and that the sleeping figure will be Manisha Koirala who will look soulfully into the camera. Well, she does. And our man wrinkles his eyebrows a little and goes to get a cup of tea for her. He’s in love, as any self-respecting AIR employee who looks at Manisha Koirala circa 1998 should be. He comes back, only to find the train leaving the station with the mysterious female already inside. And thus begins Ye First Song.
Now the next fifteen minutes is devoted to whatever our man does for a living – antagonising terrorist leaders by asking them moronic questions, antagonizing the locals by asking them stupid questions, and antagonizing the Lovely Lady He Meets again by asking her stupid questions. I mean, c’mon, when you’re taking an interpreter along, wouldn’t it be better to take an Assamese chap than a Bihari one? In course of time, he gets beaten up by some Assamese guys, all of whom speak better Hindi than any Assamese I have known. But he is steadfast. He is resolved. He hijacks the radio station and plays an AR Rahman song ( hallelujah! the man has taste! )and then ruins it by trying to enact his love story ( I take that comment about taste right back. ) There is another “figment of the imagination” song, in which the guy is obviously outrunning the Indian army and impressing the lady that way. More wrinkly eyebrows, of course.
Then suddenly the Lady Vanishes ( Yes, I have a DivX of that movie, muhuhahaha ), and the guy follows her to Ladakh. Nobody knows why they are there, except to get stuck in a sandy desert with a broken-down bus, and then to spend the night in a deserted monastery, with the guy having a semi-wet dream about dancing dervish girls in various colours. Right. So the girl ditches him again, and he feels depressed and wrinkles his eyebrows. Meanwhile, we finally discover why the girl has come to Ladakh. She’s there to indulge in a favourite Terrorist pastime – extending hands together and reciting Terrifying Terrorist Oaths in dark loghouses, all in fluent Hindi. Intermission time, fellas, and remember, if the girl you’re running after makes odd faces after you try kissing her, instead of slapping you or complaining to the police, in all likelihood she’s a terrorist. There, you don’t even need to see the first half of Dil Se.
Now we are in Delhi, and the guy is about to be engaged to – duh – a girl from Kerala. Man, what a nifty way to introduce pan-Indian appeal. On top of it, you have the girl discussing stuff like “honka-bonka-bonks” ( believe me, you don’t want to know ) and yelling for no good reason. The twist in the tale, the Maiden from Assam and Leh reappears, and she wants a room to stay and a job to boot. Man, talk about demanding females. Talk about stupid males. The girl gets both, and now that we know she is a terrorist, and that Republic Day is coming closer, and that bombs are the focal point of the film, not guns – the rest of the storyline is very predictable. Add to it Shah Rukh Khan’s turmoil ( more wrinkly eyebrows ), a Deep Dark Secret Origin of the Terrorist, one more Wet Dream set in the backwaters of Kerala, and there you have it. The ending is stupid, as if the director ran out of ideas and said “Chuck it, I am through with this movie, get me the next script, the one with the homely couple”.
Now if the movie sucks so bad, you might say, why on earth am I writing volumes about it?
Simple answer, the film has its moments. And incredible visuals. One offshoot of having pointless exquisite locations to shoot your movie in is of course the exquisite location itself. The music rocks, the background theme ( If you know me and you have heard my cellphone’s ringtone, you’d have memorised the tune by now ), played on orchestral violins, a solitary flute and sung by Sukhwindara Singh at various points of the movie forms the leit motif of the doomed “love story”. If I had my way, I would buy a DVD containing only the songs. But then, the music gives you a heightened feeling about how the film actually fares ( which is why I saw it the second time which is why I am writing this ) Manisha Koirala plays the distressed, semi-detached Terrorist well, to an extent. Her deadpan responses to Shahrukh’s playacting ( “What if we were married and had kids” kind of sweet-talk) are the highpoints of the dialogues. Incidentally, the dialogues sound as if they have been copied verbatim from some other language. None of them sound believable, not the repartee, not the endearing pleas, not the sweet premarital talk between our man and the Kerala lass.
Here’s to a film that could have been much better, to a film that wouldn’t make me cringe when I come back to the story at hand after a song plays. Here’s to a movie that deserves to be remade, that deserves a second chance. Tone up the story a little, make the characters characters instead of brainless dialogue-spouters and eyebrow-wrinklers, keep the music the same.
Shah Rukh Khan better stay away this time around.
Afterword: Gaurav Sabnis wrote a neat review of the same movie sometime back, and I can’t seem to find the link to the post. His opinions and mine differ a wee bit. I agreed with his views then, but then, I saw the movie again yesterday.
Ah beatzo, I enjoyed reading that! :)
You do have a gift for writing reviews…
Well, you could call it a gift, I suppose – though some people would disagree. :)
I never had the patience to sit thru the movie, But I LOVED the music.
now very curious to know what “honka-bonka-bonks” means??
Sitting through the movie is not a problem if you have a nice sound system. You can just close your eyes and listen to the Background score. :)
“honka-bonka-bonks”? *sigh* I will try to answer that question someday.
I love your reviews! :D
Well, that evenises us – I love your fanfics too. :)
LJ-cut plzzzz ! :)
zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
Sleep-inducing stuff written about a sleep-inducing movie, eh? :)
noo i loved dil se.
the “zzzzzz” was abt your longie post :)
Bow Bow! Grrrrr
Er, why? I don’t want to click on an extra link after I come to my LJ to read what I have written. Unless it’s something boringly personal.
It’s one of my favourite movies ;)
If I don’t watch it for 3 more years and keep listening to the cd, it will be one of my favourite movies too. ;)
It’s my favourite Movie That Has Potential, as of now.
Awwww….it isn’t that bad yaar!…..and the music redeems it further….one of the few movies where Manisha Koirala has acted properly and has looked great….Preity Zinta is nice….and SRK isn’t all that bad either! The direction is pretty good…and most of all, Delhi ends up looking better than it actually is. There.
Manisha Koirala did try to act properly at times – but the inanity of the dialogues distract you from that. If you have the DVD at hand, try watching the sequence where there is a repartee between SRK and Manisha just after the Dil Se Re song. Basically SRK trying to convince her and she refusing. It actually made me cringe, even though I am generally used to things of a pulpish nature, even pulpish love stories.
Preity Zinta is nice, true. But pointless.
The direction is pretty good if you look at individual episodes of the movie. There seems to be nothing to actually hold together the threads of the story(?)line. Like I said, it had it’s moments. The cinematography is BRILLIANT, no second thoughts – everything looks better than it actually is.
But at the end of it, you can just feel how much better it would have been.
I repeat myself, I am sorry, I keep doing that all the while.
Er, and who might this be, may I ask?
The Lost Highway
Ha ha ha. Well said, as always.
Thanks, Madhav. What do you think of the movie ?
Agree totally with you.
Ramble On,
And now’s the time, the time is now
To sing my song.
I’m goin’ ’round the world,
I got to find my girl, on my way.
I’ve been this way ten years to the day, Ramble On,
Gotta find the queen of all my dreams.
Dude, LEd Zep and Dil Se don’t mix. Or do they? Or was it a cryptic message from you to me? Hmm. Queen of all my dreams. Hmm. Ten years. Hmm.
Hmm.
don’t think too hard… the little hair left on ur head will fall.
Oh don’t worry about that. He’s got plenty spare.
Dude, you haven’t got over your hair-fetish yet???
Come to my arms.
Better idea. Come to Hyderabad. :-D
“Then suddenly the Lady Vanishes ( Yes, I have a DivX of that movie, muhuhahaha)”
now, that IS interesting..
Dil Se was ok dude.. the music was superb.. cinematography was brilliant, forget the acting.. when SRK is concerned.. he always hams his way out! Manisha was tryin to make the most of the role.. Priety was cute back then.. even tho im listenin to Suffocation’s Effigy of the Forgotten.. Ae Ajnabee is playin somewhere in the back of my head..
Ae Ajnabee is playin somewhere in the back of my head..
Ha ha, I can empathise with that. :)
Whatever else might have been wrong with the movie, (actually everything :p), the songs were aptly picturized. This is one man, Mani Ratnam, who never ruins a Rahman song. My favorite being *Satrangi Re* which was underrated for quite some time.
Huzzah! Truly said.
hah damn i missed that movie…gotta watch it
you never got fatawahed yet by the srk fans? ;)
the sharp claws of the srksmitten women will tear u to pieces gollum
I shall take a page from The Man’s book and wiggle my eyebrows at them srksmitten wimmen. There!
RGV never did a movie with SRK, right?
I feel good about that.
i second that ..
btw, RGV chooses all his actors pretty well.. suit the characters they’re playin to the T and the biggest reason for not taking SRK i feel is, he wants actors!!!
Amen!
( later in life, I was to do the same for Ramgopal Verma’s Mast)
Oh, loyalty!
———————–
Nosirree, this movie is about that Pestilence of Indian Cinema of the Nineties – the man known as Shah Rukh Khan.
So finally you deign to admit, he is a Pestilence!
Pestilence
He is, isn’t he?
he is more like a *stye* in the eye that you want to get rid of but cant until it dissolves on its own :p
I watched the movie in the hope that the romance would blossom or he’d move on…and in the end, they both did, including the film! It’s the kinda film that keeps your hopes moving ahead–from frame to frame, where you expect to see some progress or something worthwhile to happen…it’s best to watch it as a typical Bollywood, SK starrer and not as a Mani Ratnam movie…:)
I believe that
“http://gauravsabnis.blogspot.com/2002_10_01_gauravsabnis_archive.html#82958842″>this is what you refer to.
Loved what you wrote though. SRK bashing is always good for the soul.. :P
However, I do like the movie. It’s got its moments.
Sarika
Thanks very much for the link, Sarika. I searched quite sometime for it, did not find it, though.
SRK-bashing has become a habit, shucks!
And I completely agree with you – the film has its moments. If only those moments were bereft of Shah Rukh Khan’s hysterionics.
I too don’t want to click on an extra link, once I see your entry on my friends page, to read what you have written, even if it is boringly personal… :-)
:-)
Dil Se…*sighs*
The direction and the cinematography were actually quite good, add to it heavenly music, and theres three hours well spent. Only if SRK wasn’t anywhere near this movie…Yes, I say, tighten the screenplay… get better actors, shorten the length. Give more depth to the secondary actors… Yes, this movie deserves a second chance. (as do quite a few more, but lets ahave a longish post on them later, eh?). Oh, and fsck lj cuts if you dont want to. ;)
Dil se
What millenium was this again? And when was Dil se released? And why do people have so much free time? And when will i find a person who dislikes A.R.Rehmans marchpast music, and the same damn beat for every new song? And why are we discussing Dil Se when we could be discussing something more interesting like Yuva?
>What millenium was this again?
Obviously, the twentyfirst century.
>And when was Dil se released?
Somewhere in the post, I have mentioned the words “nineteen hundred and ninety eight”. Or should I have said 1998?
>And why do people have so much free time?
Moot point. Maybe because some people manage time very well, and don’t go to random livejournals too often, and hence have more time to write voluminous stuff in their own journals. “Free time” again is a very dicey term – Would you call the time you spend sleeping your “free time”? I wouldn’t.
>And when will i find a person who dislikes A.R.Rehmans marchpast music, and the same damn beat for every new song?
Go to rec.music.indian.music, you’ll find a lot of people who absolutely detest ARR’s music and occasionally refer to it in the same terms you just used. Some of them even think that there has been no original music in Indian films in the last forty five years. Pretty entertaining folks.
>And why are we discussing Dil Se when we could be discussing something more interesting like Yuva?
We?? As in you and me or you and the rest of the world or you and me and the rest of the world all together? I don’t remember “discussing” Dil Se. I posted my opinions about it, after a recent viewing of it, actually.
As for WHY I am not discussing something more interesting like Yuva, that’s because I don’t find it as interesting as you do. I found Ayutha Ezhuthu ( which happens to be the Tamil version of Yuva ) interesting enough to comment on, and that’s about it.