One of the best payoffs of my Baroda visit was the kids. My cousins, nephews and nieces, ranging from ages 4 to 12, most of whom I hadn’t met for quite sometime. Two of them stay in Goa, the rest scattered through various towns in Assam. All of them are a very spunky lot ( unlike the popular rumour, I do not hate kids. It’s not my primary aim in life to make demented psychotics out of impressionable young minds. ), one plays the tabla very well, one reads a lot, one plays a lot of games, and all of them find a variety of reasons to run around screaming their heads off and annoying the hell out of my Evil Relatives. Which makes all the kids Very Good in my book.
My sister’s in-laws are vegetarians. And I can tell you, Assamese people are a lot of things all rolled in one, but they aren’t vegetarians. We are not as carnivorous as our neighbouring cousins from Manipur or Nagaland, I still have strong olfactory reservations about eating dogs or frog’s legs – but we make do. The tendency to eat meat – er – being non-vegetarian is very strongly instilled in our tastebuds. “chicken chicken today’s chicken day” being a litany often heard in Assamese households on Sundays, and usually it’s the children who do a war-dance and repeat those words. Er, I don’t know about all children, but I often did this when I was young.
Anyways, the kids found it very tough to have veggie stuff day in and night out. As an earning adult, and being of a semi-give-in-to-temptation sort myself, I sympathized with them. So, the day of the wedding, we decided to bunk all the ceremonial stuff, and booked a car to take us to a McDonald’s outlet.
( This is beside the point, but Hyderabad does not have a McDonald’s outlet yet. It’s supposed to be a Metropolitan city, forgoshsakes )
The journey, like most journeys I undertake, was semi-surreal. Imagine a car packed with kids. Three adults to mind the kids. One of the adults with a hidden agenda. ( “Planet M? Oh, you find LOADS of video games there! And you can play all you want.” “Of course Crossword will have chocolates, very nice imported ones, too. ” ) One of the kids wants to tell a joke (she has been reading Tinkle throughout) , one wants to have Fanta, and nothing but Fanta for lunch, one wants burger and chocolate, two of them sing “action nursery rhymes” in the car, jumping up and down on the seats all the while. The driver, in a defensive stance, puts on some Jagjit Singh on the car stereo, and the kids start screaming “booooooooring!” ( mostly because one of the adults whispered “The one with the loudest voice gets an extra chocolate.” )
Have you ever considered the logistical nightmare of ordering for eight undecided ( and hungry ) kids in a burger outlet? I hadn’t, too. We live and learn.
When I am done ordering, I look around. Half the kids have vanished!! A little investigation leads me to a corner of the place, where a Playstation has been set up, and there seems to be a game of Tekken in full swing between two tykes. One from out of my gang, and the other the defending champion, from the looks of it. Anyone who was beaten had to vacate his seat, and the next guy would come play against the winner, and so on. Needless to say, I joined the line, a very smug adult among the children.
The defending dude proceeds to whip everyone who challenges him, and ( highly embarassed to say it, but I don’t like to fudge facts ) whips me too. In fact he Totally Trashes me, and gets a perfect score. Fact is, I have never played on a console before, and like anyone who’s new to anything with buttons, I end up pressing every button at the same time, in the hope of doing something. Well, that something worked out to nothing.
Later, the kid left, and just as he was pushing me, informed me – ” I have finished all the levels in this game.” Yeah, right. If I had known that, I wouldn’t have played against him.
Anyways, a nice time was had by all. We reached the wedding home about 15 minutes late, and a royal dressing-down from the parents of all concerned parties awaited us. Who cared?
But – the trauma of being defeated by a eight-year old. Bwaaah!!!
trauma…….defeated by….eight-year old
Re: trauma…….defeated by….eight-year old
Bwaaah. 10
Re: trauma…….defeated by….eight-year old
there are times when i’m ashamed to call you my friend…
-when you laugh with you head and hand swinging everywhere
-when u eat like a pig
-when you show your geelapan
-when u get defeated by an EIGHT YEAR OLD!
Re: trauma…….defeated by….eight-year old
Hum aapki bhavnaao ka qadar karte hai. ;-)
You mean there are times when you are NOT ashamed of me?? Ooooooooooh woooooooooooow!!!
The first Mc-D’s outlet in south India is soon to come up at the Forum, Kormongla, Bangalore. Meanwhile the thieves at Marrybrown will thrive.
//unlike the popular rumour, I do not hate kids. It’s not my primary aim in life to make demented psychotics out of impressionable young minds. ):
My, my, aren’t we an expert at everything Bangalorean? :D
I am .. i don’t know about ‘we’):
Yay for the 8 yr old !!
Why don’t you be a sweet li’l guy and root for the underdog instead? Hmm?
Kids usually are the underdogs, but with hindsight, perhaps you’re the one who needed support :-p
Is there any more
routingrooting left to do?woah?
“I sympathized with them.” … “and booked a car to take us to a McDonald’s outlet.”
Dude, what in god’s name were you smoking when you typed that out? Or is McDonald’s in India a bastardized version of “Hotel Udupi Palace” that serves choice chicken biriyani? If it is what I think it is (sic), then well, god be with you, son.
Re: woah?
McDonalds seems to be the only place in le Vadodara that serves something akin to meat. The other alternative was roadside “Chainis” outlets that serve “chikan birani” and “batar chikan ” and stuff.
Re: woah?
Chaini outlets are really where you should have gone, really … IMHO. I’d rather die hungry than be fed (sic) at McD’s but then again, that’s just me. ;/
Re: woah?
I hate to think of the parents’ cumulative reaction had I given all of those kids a strong attack of Ze Runs, in addition to getting them late for the wedding.
…and like anyone who’s new to anything with buttons, I end up pressing every button at the same time, in the hope of doing something.
Something reminds me of mortal Kombat sessions…
:-D
haha nothing to be traumatised about
i am sure that kiddo wouldve beaten any of us here…
on the brighter side think..the kid would be so happy and say something different in school next week…. “i bet all the guys as usual…and yeah there was this uncle too whom i trashed”
ps: u r listening to a tamil song??
Hey, that’s actually a nice thing, come to think of it. I made the kid a local hero of sorts in his school, eh? Unless some other kid says – “Hah! That’s nothing! I beat ALL my father’s friends once. ” :-))
Yes, Kaadhal Virus came out just last year, and I love the Sonnalum song. One of ARR’s overlooked gems.
he he. oh hahahahahaha!
urm, really sorry dude. Uh… happens once in a freakish while. :D
Also, if it was Tekken, beating all the difficulty levels in it isn’t really much of a feat. Playing against actual human beings is where its at. Which Tekken, though?
*sigh*
Et Tu, Sam?
Tekken 5.
sorry man, couldn’t resist. You can come over and kick my ass anytime though… you won’t even have to try too hard, I suck at Tekken.