I was thinking of replying to bloggolb‘s Query, on my rant about Pavitr Prabhakar, the Indian version of Spiderman. The question was – in case you don’t want to use the link (I wouldn’t if I were you, it takes an awfully long time to load ) – Granted, that you do not like Pavitr Prabhakar and what Kang has done, but if Gotham comics gives you the carte blanche on creating the Indian version of spidey, what would you do differently? And why ?

Well, for starters, let me make it clear that this is going to be a rant. You have full permission to snicker and say “Fanboy!”, I shall not complain.

Non-earth shaking statement #1: If Gotham Comics gave me carte blanche on creating the Indian version of Spiderman, I would make sure there wasn’t an Indian version of Spiderman. There are already too many versions of Spidey around to confuse the heck out of a reader, and you don’t need one from India too..

Non-earth shaking statement #2: There are a lot of things that can be done to create a comics “scene” in India.

Bear with me. I am about to expound on statement#2. This won’t be a complete answer to bloggolb’s question, just some lame thoughts.

Part One: The good things Gotham has been doing:

For starters, the pricing structure is reader-friendly. Fifteen rupees for single issues, twenty-five rupees for a “double” issue, and 90 rupees for Super-Specials, which are 6 issues of stories tied together, much better than the 700 rupees-and-above price of imported Trade Paperbacks.

There has been a strong consistency in the publishing schedule. Gotham has kept putting out comics on a very steady level, very rarely skipping monthly deadlines. They have also been reprinting a broad spectrum of titles, ranging from the black and white Conan ( mostly reprints of the seventies’ Marvel editions ), Dark Horse’s licensed Tarzan miniseries, to mainstream DC titles like JLA and Superman, and the best of the Marvel Ultimate line. A large number of Cartoon Network titles for the kids – familiar names like Johnny Bravo and Scooby Doo and Dexter’s Laboratory.

Continuity, which, in my opinion is the main reason why new readers don’t get into comics in the first place. You cannot just start reading a Superman story and find out that the President of the United States is Lex Luthor ( not anymore, though), without having at least a brief knowledge of what went before. Maybe this is why people still read Phantom. Because every Phantom comic begins with “For those who came in late…” and you know where you stand. Gotham fumbled at first, it’s reprints a mishmash of eighties’ stories and the latest storylines, but after a time, it settled down in a groove. Of late, it’s taken to reprinting storylines that went by just a year ago. The Hush story, for instance. Or Superman: Birthright. Ultimate Spiderman.

Finally,Gotham studios, which started off with a very tall promise – that of harnessing the upcoming writers and artists who are interested in creating comics. Jeevan J Kang is one of them, and Pavitr Prabhakar is the first product, and I don’t know if that’s an indication of what’s coming next. But it’s a noble endeavour anyway, and deserves kudos.

Part 2: Chinks in the armour

Who decides which titles Gotham is reprinting? I don’t know. Who buys Gotham titles like Namor The Submariner and Iron Man and Marvel Max Daredevil and Wonder Woman? I don’t, and as far as I know, no one else does, which is why, even at the end of the month, there are tonnes of copies of these issues lying around in the news-stand, and the Sunday market stalls are choked with the same issues which are selling for 1/3rd cover price.It hasn’t been too long since Gotham comics has begun its business in India, and the number of titles it brings out is immense. You might think it’s a good thing, especially for comics-starved readers. But quality matters, my friend, and there exists something important called a First Impression. Too much of bad titles in the market can easily drive away a new reader who is trying out one of those poorly written comics for the first time.

The main reason is, in my humble opinion, the lack of information about what people who are interested in comics actually want to read. Unwittingly or otherwise, Gotham comics is hammering home the fact that comics are all about brainless costume-clad metahumans battering the tar out of each other by bringing in substandard titles. One wonders how many business decisions in the Gotham offices are based on letters from some kook who loves reading Wonder Woman and wants more Wonder Woman to be published. There’s that “comics-are-for-kids” mentality that forces Gotham to churn out parent-friendly material. There is nothing wrong with comics aimed solely at children – but give the intelligent reader a thought, huh?

Suppose you’re an a reader who’s been newly introduced to Agatha Christie. You have read Pocketful of Rye, and you’re dying to read more Agatha Christie. Your friends will tell you ( if they don’t, they are morons) that the best way to read Christie is from the beginning, and that the Poirot stories are the best – so you go out to buy The Mysterious Affair At Styles. Chances are, you will find that book in any good bookshop you go to. Because books are always in print, that’s why.

If I compare the scenario above to, say, Gotham’s Ultimate X-Men Super Special # 3 ( you have just read it etc etc) , and you go out trying to look for the very first UXM Super-special, you won’t find it. Trust me on that. Which, you will admit, puts a bummer on your Ultimate X-Men desires. Bye bye, Mr Potential Customer, and you can point that finger to Gotham Comics, Bangalore, that does not believe in keeping titles in print. There. ( There is a solution, however. You could contact…ahem….people who have spent precious office bandwidth downloading all issues of UXM printed until now. That or amazon.com )

I have a sneaky feeling this is going to turn into El Monstro Post, if I don’t stop now and collect my thoughts. What the heck, part 3 later. Counter-thoughts and Pats On The Back for the above ideas welcome. As are Howls of Derision.

The Yoko Kanno Project

Yoko Kanno is the lady who has scored the amazing soundtracks for Cowboy Bebop, the TV series which, thanks to harish_an, is no longer part of my wishlist. This site has interviews with her, and samples of her works from other anime series, and also a couple of transcribed guitar tabs and written scores.

A New York Times Article about Susannah Clarke’s book

Who is Susannah Clarke? I didn’t know, until Neil Gaiman mentioned her in a post of his, and then in another post, and yet another, and today, he links to this four-page article. The book is entitled ”Jonathan Strange & Mr. Norrell”, and it’s about magic, and I think the hype is getting to me.

The Crow Novel

A novel based on the screenplay, and written by a fan named Jeanette Barcroft who saw the first Crow movie, and was so taken by it that she dropped everything else and spent the next few weeks writing this novel, which, I admit, gives me as much goosepimples as the movie did the first time I saw it. The only flaw I can point to is that there is an overabundance of literary quotes – though they do not take away any of the pleasure of the book itself, they distract you from it.

I read it two years ago, but I want to renew the experience, with the soundtrack playing over my headphones.

Cerebus Stories Online

Heh heh heh.

Something that bothers me one heck of a lot is that probably, I will never get to see an Indian movie in its complete form.

Note 1: I do not mean every Indian movie. I am not crazy.
Note 2: Some Indian movies are exempt from the generalisation. Reasons below.

When I am in the theater, there will be some Great Soul spewing rot behind me, because he doesn’t like the movie and he thinks no one else would. Some Happy Family sits right next to my seat, and the Happy Kids decide not to be happy anymore. Popcorn packets are mauled. Cellphones ring. Somebody is sneezing in a corner of the theater. People say “excuse me” and shuffle to the toilet, wander into the theater half an hour late and try out their torchlight-enhanced cellphones, and of course, there’s always someone who opens the theater door to let the air (and the light) in.

I admit I am guilty of indulging in some of the above perversions above. But I am not blaming anybody. A nation of clueless non-queuers cannot be expected to behave themselves in a movie theatre ( ooh, sanctimonious moi!), and so I sigh exasperatedly, and forgive my movie-going brethren their transgressions. Unless it’s a Karan Johar movie, in which case, I become the Great Soul That Spews Rot for the guy sitting in front of me.

So, I want to see a Movie properly, and I can’t be expected to see it in a theatre. What to do, oh, where to go?

DVDs.

A year ago, I would have said VCDs. But times have changed, and my computer needs have been fulfilled. Glorious 5.1 sound. 720*480 resolution pictures ( vcd is only 320*240, blah!) And so DVD it is, one shiny platter where it would have been two. Two discs in case of Special editions.

Now waitaminit. Special Editions? Indian movies and Special editions?

The guy who runs the neighbourhood DVD-renting shop tells me he has got a special DVD. “Which movie?”, I ask. “Lagaan”, he says. “So what is special about it?” “You have Lagaan, Mela and Gadar on a DVD. Imagine, THREE movies in one DVD.”, he says, and smirks. He is very pleased because he has given his customer value for money. Or, as I look at it, bang for the buck.

You get those “special” DVDs for 300 rupees each in the streets of Koti, prices negotiable, so if you buy them once, you get them for 50 rupees less the next time. “5.1 Dalby(sic) Digital Experience”, claims the cover. Bombay was the movie I was looking for, in case you’re interested. Nobody seemed to have it, until this guy showed me a copy of Bombay and Roja together, a special CD with two special movies. Of course I bought it, after negotiating the prices to a very reasonable level. Watched movies, enjoyed whole-heartedly. Mani-sir is God and all that.

And a month later, the freakin’ thing stopped working. It didn’t even get detected by the drive.

“To hell with it”, I thought. “I am going legit.”. So off I went, to buy a legitimate DVD of Bombay at Music World. And it said FOUR HUNDRED AND NINETY FIVE RUPEES for a single movie.

Now, hold on.

International DVDs are priced between rupees 499 and 999. Among other things, they include a Director’s commentary, special features like cast interviews, alternate endings, enhanced content for PC users, deleted scenes, theatrical trailers – the works. And what do Indian DVDs have in their “special features”? 5.1 Surround Sound ( which is effectively the same as saying that it makes 5.1 special because we’re pointing it out to you) . Multiple subtitles, it says. Tamil, Telugu, Malayalam, Bengali, Hindi, Punjabi and even *gasp* English! Every DVD has CHAPTER-BASED ACCESS, just to tell you how easy it is to start watching the movie again after your power blows in the middle of an important scene. And yes, the most important feature – individual song-access. Wow. Boggles the mind. We buy a movie DVD and get access to ANY song at the press of a button. I need to pay four hundred and ninety five rupees for it. If the packaging is really bad, I need to pay 350 rupees only. Whee. Song-based access needs cash, so pay up, eh?

IF you’re wondering about my continuous rant about the high price, let me assure you – I am perfectly willing to pay four hundred and ninety five rupees for a Bombay DVD that gives me bang for my buck. If they include scenes that were deleted from the movie during the theatrical release. If the crew and cast prepare a commentary. If the DVD includes the audiostreams in which the movie was released – namely Hindi, Tamil, Telugu and Kannada. Newspaper/TV articles that point out the controversy Bombay had to suffer before, and after it was released. Maybe a semi-documentary that illustrates the history of why the Bombay riots happened.

For that matter, I am willing to shell out a lot more for a Director’s cut of Sholay, that features the lost alternate ending in which Sanjeev Kumar ends up killing Gabbar Singh. And deleted scenes, of course, and interviews. A proper version of Lagaan, with additional scenes from the cricket match and Satyajit Bhatkal’s documentary The Making of Lagaan included. Heck, even Santosh Sivan’s Asoka, if it comes with all the uncut footage ( which made its appearance in the TV series Asoka). Boxed sets of the Ramgopal Verma movies – with Director’s commentary and Production insights and scriptwriters explaining their modus operandi.

Wait, I need to rinse the drool out.

I know I am asking for too much. With the exception of Dil Chahta Hai – the only two-disc DVD package available in the Indian market right now, and oh, Farhan Akhtar, how I love you – there is nothing that remotely comes close to what one expects from a DVD. It’s almost as if the filmmaker washes his hands off his creation once it’s out and he’s made whatever money he expected to make. Obviously no one from the film is involved in the DVD-creation process, hence you get badly mastered film/sound, cheap packaging, and inflated prices. Which means, as of now, it’s more lucrative to stick to your neighbourhood “special” DVDs with 3-movies-in-one, because the legitimate one is going to be equally bad, so why bother?

The only positive thing I can think of, with regards to all this, is that Lagaan hasn’t come out yet in a legitimate VCD/DVD format. When it does, I suspect ( and hope ) Aamir Khan and co. will rock my socks off. Fingers crossed.