I am not too sure what I am more pissed by – morons who do not know how to zip and attach a folder to a mail and thereby end up screwing up a day of feature-based productivity ( did you know how much confusion the lack of a single file in a configuration folder can create? ) or one more passing comment about would-be Prime Ministers and Chief Ministers. Do I care? No, let me frame this better – do I look I care? As far as I am concerned, I would still be shooed to the side of the road and made to stand in the heat, along with a hundred other people while our Hallowed Leaders pass by. As if it would make a difference if I knew who’s sitting behind dark-tinted windows in an airconditioned car whizzing by me at ninety miles per hour.
Yes, I am politically retarded. Shoot me. I have never had the inclination to vote, nor the desire to do so in the future, immediate or otherwise. No, I have no inclinations whatsoever of leaving this country and settling somewhere else because you know, everything about India sucks and Indians suck and the Whole System is sooo far gone, sweetheart – nope, it’s nothing of that sort. Just that I do not see any good in adding 0.00000046 percent to the balance that decides which random way the shit will rain on Our Beloved Country by exercising my judgement, Free Will, Democratic rights et al.
I have been trying to figure out why exactly politics evoke such negative reactions in me, you know, sifting thorugh childhood memories and finding Jungian roots and all that bunkum. Maybe it’s an offshoot of being in a family where the Father is in the Police Department. Or tuitions under a Social Studies teacher who thought the best way to deal with politicians was to put them in a train and have someone drive the train off a cliff.( Aha! Transferance of Guilt! ), and realising a little too early that life in India is always hunky-dory if you know the Superintendent of Police. Even the OC in the local Police Station would do, actually. ( Of course, knowing a Minister or two would be a definite improvement. But there is this ingrained feeling of sliminess involved. Apologies to anyone who knows any politicians. ) Maybe I have seen too many of those socially relevant films where the Main Man’s sister gets bad things done to her and he runs from pillar to post looking for justice and finally decides to take a gun and shoot everybody’s collective asses to hell and back. There were loads of them socially R films, true. But the one that sticks to my mind is the one with the old guy with the mystic martial arts from Kerala.
Then there is this peculiar thought I once had, about my kid coming and asking me something like – “Oh my gosh, papa ( or daddy, or dude, whatever my kid decides to call me ) you actually voted this freaking moron into power? What are you, some kind of dimbulb or something?” Well, I can take that from my wife, for sure. But a kid, my kid – telling me this? I would rather let him beat me at Tekken 3 as much as he wants.
Fact is, I think my thought processes are somewhat…er…infantile. I have had people telling me that I live in a world of my own, and to tell you the truth, I kinda believe them too. That world does not have electoral processes that involve me deciding how best to contribute to Chaos. ( interesting, I thought of the word “Chaos” with a capital C because I am reading a Michael Moorcock book right now. Interesting to me, that is.) That world definitely does not have ANY part of my mental or physical faculties dedicated to keeping myself up-to-date with whatever my Khadi-clad brethren are up to. Of course, with this concept of “my” world also comes the allegation of losing touch with reality, you know, being someone who is totally unaware of what’s going on around him, and all that jazz.
You know what? I am perfectly happy with that.
And I still hate morons that cannot zip and attach a folder to a mail.
Mna…Aren’t u ashamed to say this????u will this sarcastic essay of urs is indeed a procalamtion of your glory???????????
U should live with self pride only hten will u learn to love ur nation…. u stay there in that seat and look at that dumbo terminal of urs becuse of somebody in that so called dashing car that passes by.If u are not sitting ina better seat it’s also becuse of that…
this si precisely why british ruled India for so long…
godd i wish i find some medice to inject some self pride in Indins..I would give it to you for freee….
love ur nation dumboo
Here’s where i practice my editorial skills
Man, are you not ashamed to say this? This sarcastic essay is indeed a proclamation of your glory. First develop some self pride, only then can you love your nation.
You sit there and stare at that dumb computer of yours because of somebody in the so called dashing car that passes by. However, If you are not in a better position, you owe it to the same person.
This is precisely why the British ruled India for so long.
Oh God! I wish to find a serum that can induce some self-pride in Indians. For publicity, I will give it to you for free.
Love thy nation, fool.
Editor’s note: The original passage was at its vaguest. Last line of para-2 contradicts the purpose of the passage, nullifying every other argument. Original para-3 appears needlessly as it does not get any support from either para-2 or para-4. Para-4 does not indicate whether the author intends to invent the serum or discover it or wait for someone else to do so and take the credit himself. Also, para-4 fails to inform readers if the author intends to test the serum on himself first.
:)
word.
Re: :)
:) the anonymous asked for it.
There were 16 question marks in your comment. Man, talk about questionable characters….
medice, Indins, godd, si, dumboo, hten, procalamtion, urs, Mna, ina, si
I hate to get personal, but which field are you a radish from, actually?
please don’t blame ur retardness on ur social studies teacher…U moron,ur kid wil lask u how insensitive could u get to ur nation…one step ahead u will ahve that same feeling to ur kid too…
u can never have a world of ur own if others donot let you. I understand this great antion has its failures..but it is citizens like you that make this nation even more handicapped…
rise for everything that loves you…
wahtever u ahve displayed here are a bunch of words which u beleive can exhibit ur supremacy on the language( which infact i feel could have been done lot better) and an individual who doesnot even deserve pity for his ignorance…read ,look and understnad and then speak
wahtever u ahve displayed here are a bunch of words which u beleive can exhibit ur supremacy on the language
Ah.
I think the usage of “et al” is incorrect? Isn’t it used for people? “Rao, et. al” to talk/cite of a paper written by Rao, Mao, Cao, Zhao and Lao, say?
Hao Hao!
Absolutely correct, Ravi-san. Wrong usage on my part – “et al” is indeed referred to people.
Nitpick: I personally remember the latin translation of “et al” to mean “and others”, and “et cetera” meaning ” and other things”. Couldn’t “and others” be used to include non-sentient stuff too?
Re: Hao Hao!
beetzoe, w00t! How ya doin?
CAT: verbal ability -> re-arrange jumbled sentences
Kindly do not blame your retarded senses on your Social Studies teacher. You moron, your kid will ask you ‘how insensitive could you get towards your nation’. Sometime down the line, you will feel the same.
You can never have a world of your own unless others let you to. I agree that Mother India has her drawbacks but citizens like you handicap her more.
Rise for everything that loves you and fall with it.
What you have displayed here is a bunch of words that you believe can exhibit your supreme command over the language, which I feel could have been better and an individual who does not deserve any pity for his ignorance.
Read, see, understand and then speak.
Mai Selph thinks: Oh god, please god, please spare me such torture in CAT paper. I dont think i can clean such an awfully jumbled collection of words, ever again.:-S
Re: CAT: verbal ability -> re-arrange jumbled sentences
Heh.. Good god.. I never thought it possible but you are funnier than beatzo :)
Re: CAT: verbal ability -> re-arrange jumbled sentences
:)) Thanks!
Anonymous comments as these are capable of bringing out the humour in anybody.
Re: CAT: verbal ability -> re-arrange jumbled sentences
You are funnier!!! HAHAHAHAHA.
funnier!!!
Yes, indeed. in the absence of Grandaddy’s witty one-liners!
Re: funnier!!!
You be heap funny, mocca. All the best for entrance exams of the feline variety.
Gaurav
Re: funnier!!!
thanks :)
Boss, I am sorry for rattling you so much with my humble post. I mean, two different comments expressing similar inspirational sentiments, with similar sounding language, and that too from the same IP ( Sasi, could you run a whois on 216.254.100.235 ? Thanks! ) one after the other? Chill, man, you need to relax. Ogle at Sonia a little on the news, read the Times of India, talk about our Great Nation with your room-mate over dinner.
You are a very nice guy, I know.
if you know the Superintendent of Police
Damn! This stuff really works…all the negative comments are anonymous :P
one with the old guy with the mystic martial arts from Kerala
That would be another one of Kemel Saar’s gems!!
Damn! This stuff really works…all the negative comments are anonymous :P
Can’t you read between the lines? That’s Shahrukh Khan. He hates me because I don’t like his eyebrows.
Kemel Saar’s gems!!
Oh , absolutely, man! India’s only PROPER superhero movie.
my two sestertii
oh, my tutor used to do that at University all the time.
I hated it. I mean, how hard is it to click ‘zip’ or ‘attach’?
Aargh. Total empathy, amigo.
As if it would make a difference if I knew who’s sitting behind dark-tinted windows in an airconditioned car whizzing by me at ninety miles per hour
No, but I mean where in India are you, dude??
I just want to come there so I can drive. Ninety. Man. :)
I could be anywhere in India, man. Well, anywhere that has a cavalcade of Politicians flipping the bird at traffic rules and whizzing past harried citizens so technically any State capital. They go ninety, I tell you. Well, ok, I exaggerate, but when you’re in the sun trying not to slip on your own sweat, anything that moves past with sirens and dark-tinted windows looks like it’s moving at ninety.
:)
We need all types I guess. When someone is the audio equivalent of the Library of Congress, whether he votes or not is a very minor point to me.
We need all types I guess.
Precisely. I am glad to live in my country, however flawed its Democratic Principles might be.
Library of Congress would be stretching things a little too far. Plus, it sounds a little ..er…vulgar, don’t you think?
I would have said ‘Record Company’ if you weren’t their biggest enemy. (I wonder if there’s a sum on your head?! :p )
Bravo!
Am sure your kids will have better things to question you on :)
Yes, stuff like “Can I watch Kill Bill today again, daddy?” or “Can I go lop off Teddy’s head with my sword, daddy?”
mostly harmless
i told you not to see all those horror movies and play all those gory video games, see now what they’ve done to your innards? politicians are these generally docile guys who warm a chair and do their work just as we do ours. the nice part is, we gets to play the manager, beatsso, yess we does. we does their appraisal.
That’s a beautiful way of looking at it, Banana, I swear.
But: ( you knew this was coming, didn’t you? )
these generally docile guys who warm a chair and do their work just as we do ours.
Well, they warm chairs, alright. Docile? DO their work? I disagree.
The key word is “play”, sweetums. We “play” the manager, and then it’s back to the grind for 5 more years when we work and THEY play.
Loved the post! :-D
Thank you! :) I hope you are prepared for the next quiz.
On a totally unrelated note, I think you will be an extremely cool dad. Take a survey – any kid’ll prefer a Tekken 3 playing, Batman reading Kill Bill watching daddy dude to a political armchair critic type father. So not to worry, if he questions your political apathy, distract him with a graphic novel ;)
Thank you!
if he questions your political apathy, distract him with a graphic novel ;)
Yups! And if SHE (the daughter) questions my political apathy, I shall put the DVD of Shogun Assassin on and give her a bucket of popcorn.
Your political views are your own… but I am of the belief that if you do not care to vote, you have no right to crib. Period.
And then there is the old argument of “little drops of water, little grains of sand..” , each and every person can and does make a difference.
just my $0.02
Er, crib?
You mean I can’t, ever, in my whole freakin’ adult life, COMPLAIN about ANYTHING?? :-O
What kind of a democracy is this, anyways?
Yes, if each and every person decides not to vote, decides he doesn’t need any more monkey-business going around with his country’s finances – you are right, it will make a big difference.
*grin*
Amendment:
…if you do not care to vote, you have no right to crib about the people who get elected, and the decisions they make.…
To quote (probably not too accurately, but you will get my gist) … “With great power comes great responsibility”. Your vote is your power, and you have the responsibility to use it responsibly.
only one thing..
the gist of your post if I am correct is that you dont give a damn about indian politics and ramifications thereof.
But why then the post?
As far as I see, nobody on the LJ asked for your opinion.
A quick perusal of my userinfo page should give you all the answers you seek, mein freund. But I shall save you the frenzied clicking, and I shall tell you myself.
You are not correct. The gist of my post happens to be “I Am Pissed Off By Two Things At The Moment”. “I” being Beatzo, or the name you know me by, two very similar individuals who get along well at times.
Now we come to the more important (tee hee) question.
But why then the post? and the line that follows it.
Hmm. I find it funny, coming from someone who has known me for more than three years, that I would actually venture an opinion only after someone on (the?) LJ asked me for it. What d’you think this is, buddy, opinionated-post-on-demand or something?
Why then the post? I shall borrow words from someone‘s mouth, and I shall twist them ( that is, I shall behave like a Typical Indian Politician ), and I shall answer your question.
MY blog.
MY opinion.
MY mess, MY business.
Dude, if you are posting stuff in your blog because others are asking you for opinions, well, can I make a request sometime?
your pleasure always… (your lj i.e.)
and you can always make the request
the intent or rather the reason for my comment…
this particular post was just too big an eyesore.
(eyesore to me i.e.) (something you would identify with i.e.)
so a reaction that was elicited to your post.
and the question was more in context to the content (But why then the post?) of your post than to the intent of your post.
Rarely does one come across a post that is titled ‘rant’ and still manages to make one smile all the way to the end.
You know what bugs me more than unzipped attachments? The attached forwarded mails that open up in ten windows!
The worst part is where you find out the very last mail which is supposed to contain the message body of FWD: fwd:fwd: re: fwd: funny story has the same joke you saw last night on three of your friends’ entries. :)
I agree.
Any mail that has more than one level of Fwd gets deleted immediately. :-)
Use Thunderbird!! No more clicking open 10 windows. Of course deleting the Fwd is a far better option, but when you have friends that get all hurt if you didn’t read their inane fwd…
just to remain on topic… good post beatzo.. (is that redundant?) and commentors.. i loved the taking apart of the (other) anonymous poster… hehe
:-) Very well written. First good thing to make me smile today. Thanks!
Contrary to what you thought, Sasi, I didn’t write those anonymous comments myself, swear. You can thank the nice gentleman for his laughs when he comes out of his closet. ;-)
So, who you gonna vote the next time?
Ghaghra.
hey!
man…this is the first time i saw ur journal…i guess ur journal have the best appearance of all the journals i scanned…..amazing baap!
Re: hey!
Thank you! :)